When I Am King...

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About the author:
Chet Haase is a software geek and writer living and working in Silicon Valley. He regularly posts humor writings on his weblog at http://chetchat.blogspot.com.

When I Am King...

Authored by Chet Haase

When I am King... this book will be required reading. Until then, consider it important background reading on future social policy. And an excellent beer coaster.

With life comes life's many critical problems, such as:

  • Why are wedding ceremonies so very long, often outlasting the marriages themselves?
  • Why are we forced to celebrate wedding anniversaries, inevitably leading to stress, forgetfullness, guilt, anger, recriminations, and alimony?
  • We're constantly making mistakes in life and have no one to blame but ourselves. Why can't we hire someone to take the blame?
  • Why are women's showers so packed with bottles and substances that there's no room left for the people?
  • Why aren't newborn babies clearly labeled with their sex to avoid awkward assumptions by strangers?
  • Why are newborn stats reported in weight and length, like fish?

Fortunately, this manifesto exists to deal with these and other pressing problems that we all face in work, relationships, parenting, eating, and life overall.

Publication Date:
1440466971 / 9781440466977
Page Count:
Binding Type:
US Trade Paper
Trim Size:
6" x 9"
Black and White
Related Categories:
Humor / Form / Essays

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